Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
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