If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
