White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
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