I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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