I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
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