Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize