Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
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