i need an iv and a liver transplant
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
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