she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
