Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
