Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
