Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
