farters have to be the big spoon...
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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