Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
