And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Randomize
