elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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