i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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