im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
