Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
