Fine. I'll sleep in my office
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
