i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
