Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Randomize
