yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
