I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize