I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
