I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
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