Just mADE A PArabola og urine
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Randomize
