Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
He did a backflip because drugs
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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