so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Randomize
