How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Floor bacon is actually really good
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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