The maid of honor just puked.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
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