My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
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