how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
