you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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