We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
