Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
Randomize
