South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
