I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
