i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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