talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
