You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
