There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
