yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
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