Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
I don't think brook has ever known best
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Randomize
