do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Ladies don't puke and tell
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
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