please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
