yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
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