I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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