I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
