had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Randomize
